You have me
by chloeanneeee
Summary: Dean is feeling alone, and though Castiel is the one who has just watched his family fall from the skies, he still feels loyal enough to let Dean know that he is there for him, and always will be. Set after the Season 8 finale. Warning for spoilers.


Dean has changed into an un-ironed shirt which he found in his drawers, and he has leant Cas an old jumper of his from the bottom of his cupboard. The fallen angel suddenly didn't feel very comfortable in his dirty trench coat anymore.

Dean was sitting by the window, just looking up at the sky. He had settled Sammy down, dosed him with paracetamol to take away the headache, knowing that it would return in a couple of hours but it was enough to take the pain away to let his little brother sleep. He needed to sleep. He needed anything but to stay awake. His words still burned in Dean's head... _"So?"_ So he let Sammy sleep, and Dean will fix him tomorrow, like he always does.

Cas walked into the room, and caught Dean with his head in his hands, mumbling something under his breath. Cas wondered if he was praying. Then felt empty at the thought of never being able to hear Dean's prayers again.

Dean stood up at the sound of Cas' footsteps. "Cas?" Dean rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands. They blurred red and Cas realised that Dean had been crying. "You should be sleeping."

"I can't." Cas tilted his head. "I don't even know how to." He dropped his head. "Why have you been crying, Dean?"

"Crying? What? I haven't." Dean smiled at Cas, tilting his had to motion him over. "You don't know how to sleep then, no?"

Cas just shook his head. "I've never slept before."

"I can help you. I mean, if you want."

Cas nodded. "I've watched you sleep though, Dean. You don't seem to know how to do it very well, either."

Dean shrugged. "God knows, I need a good nights sleep."

"Why won't God give you one then?" Cas tilted his head and Dean chuckled under his breath slightly.

"Since when does God ever given me anything that I want?"

"You've got me." Cas mumbled. Something stirred in his stomach, something he had never felt before, it felt like insects crawling under his skin, or wings fluttering against his insides. He wasn't sure if it was a pleasurable feeling or not. His heart seemed to beat quicker and he could feel his pulse in his ears. "I mean, God ordered to get you out of hell, and I did. You must have wanted that."

Dean nodded. "Yeah. Always got you, haven't I Cas?" Dean shuffled closer. Cas could smell him, a musky smell, a mix of alcohol and blood, with a hint of a shower gel. Cas smiled and nodded as Dean turned back to face the window. "What now, Cas?" Dean sighed. "What am I gonna do?"

"What do you mean?"

"Where do I start? I mean, we have Kevin on lockdown, we have a half-human, half-demon King of Hell in our dungeon, thousands of fallen angels with Metatron waving his wand and doing his own bidding upstairs, and in amongst all of that I got my little brother to look after and fix up...again. What am I gonna do?"

"Why do you keep saying that?"

"Saying what?"

"_I_. You keep saying _I_. It's not that anymore Dean, it never has been that, you've never been alone Dean. You've always had Sam, you've had Bobby, you've had Ellen, and Lisa, and Ben-"

Dean's voice was seeped in anger, something that stung Cas and set him back slightly, yet he listened to Dean's temper. "Well if you hadn't realised, Cas, apart from one of them who is my broken brother, half of those are dead and the other half don't know who I am anymore-"

"And you've got me." Cas interrupted. "In amongst my mistakes and your mistrust in me, I am here. You're not alone in this, Dean."

Dean turned to face Cas, a soft smile on his face. "I really have always got you, haven't I?"

Cas nodded and looked down at his feet. He noticed that the side of Dean's shoe was touching the side of his, and it was the second time that evening that Cas was highly aware of how close he and Dean were. His memory zoomed through all of human interaction and tried to think of how people comforted others. Even as an angel he knew how a simple hand on the shoulder could comfort someone, just as Dean had comforted him that way too. He had hugged others and hugged others, but that just seemed too much in this sort of situation. Instead, he took his hand from behind his back and moved it over to Dean's. He wasn't sure what he was doing, but he slowly linked their fingers together, waiting for Dean to pull away and let out a sigh of relief he hadn't realised he had been holding when Dean opened his fingers and moved his hand to lock it with Cas'.

"Yes, Dean. You will always have me." He rubbed his thumb against Dean's and watched as Dean's lips turn upwards into the truest smile that Cas had seen from him in at least a year. The last time Dean smiled like that at Cas was after finding him in purgatory. The smile comforted Cas. It comforted him until Dean helped him to sleep by holding him, and though Dean didn't even mention it, Cas could tell that it was the best nights sleep Dean had had in a while too.


End file.
